Smile When You Think of Me...

I had a dream last night. The kind of dream where it is so real and you wake up right afterwards and relive it again and again over in your mind.

I was at a table, writing in a notebook, making lists in boxes. A list of things that Austin can't do or missed out on.

The top of the page read, A List of Austin.

I wrote…

I can’t tell him I love him.

________________________________


He never got to marry.

________________________________


He didn’t get to have children.

________________________________


He doesn’t know I love him.

________________________________





As I am writing this, Ryan and Austin are both in the room. Austin walks over and reads what I am writing.

Austin said, “Mom, Do I make you smile?”

“Yes, Austin.”

Austin said, “Then smile when you think of me and I will know you are thinking of me and you love me.”